The Consequences of Eavesdropping, Chapter 1

Harleen Quinzel was done for good this time. Sure, she had said that every single time in the past, but she meant it this time. She really and truly did. As soon as she managed to bust out of Arkham, she was on her own for good, and would certainly not go running to the Joker, and would never dream of taking him back if he came after her again. She was done with him.
Ever since she had landed here in the first place, after he had used her as a distraction to escape yet again, she had repeated that. Of course, there were some times in the first few days that she would have gone back to him with open arms if he had broken her out, saying she had done a good job helping him get away, but after a week of hoping, she knew that he wasn't coming for her. Just like always.
But unlike always, she wasn't getting back in. She was going to stay far, far away from him once and for all, and prove to the world that she was a capable criminal who didn't need him to get things done. She was never going to be known solely as “the Joker's hench-girlfriend” again.
Poison Ivy was proud of her, and though she didn't quite believe Harley's claims, she tried her best to be encouraging. Even though that involved listening to Harley vent for hours on end about it, she still tolerated it, because she was willing to do just about anything to ensure the young woman stayed away from that lifestyle. She just hoped that Harley would get over it sooner, rather than later, as she was getting sick of every recreation hour consisted of listening to another rant.
“I just don't know why I put up with him for so long,” she said one day, pointing out something that she had already said quite a few times. “I mean, look at me! I could have had any man I wanted. Still could, if I tried for 'em.”
“Then why don't you?” asked Ivy, clearly bored.
“You're right, Red!” she said, laughing. “I should find some lucky guy to rebound with. I just don't know where to start...” Ivy rolled her eyes, not in the mood to listen to Harley discuss the merits of sleeping with every man she had ever met, but as the blonde started listing, she didn't seem to have a chance.
“Of course, I'd probably do Batsy, but who wouldn't?” She snickered. “He's got that strong jaw, and it would drive Mistah J wild to think about! But I doubt he'd ever go for it. Twofy's not half bad-” Again she snickered.- “but wouldn't that be weird? Ya know, since you guys had that thing back before he started his double act?”
Ivy wouldn't have dignified with that a response anyway, but Harley was still on a roll, not giving her a chance to fit a role in edgewise. “Jervis is kinda cute, but I think he's still hung up on that girl that landed him in here, and me and Crane argue too much about our different focuses of study back in college to actually get anything done. I'm not too fond of getting frostbite, either.”
“Well, then,” said her red headed companion, finally finding a space to fit into the conversation, “maybe you shouldn't focus on finding a new guy. Especially since all you can think of is what's wrong with everyone. Maybe you should-”
But Harley interrupted her, saying, “Fine, Red, I'll focus on things I like. I like older guys a lot, but not too much older, which totally rules out Pengy- though his thing with the fish would have ruled him out anyway. I do want someone classy, though.” Her eyes lit up suddenly. “Ooh, I know, I know! The Riddler! Eddie is definitely older than me, and he's intelligent and not bad on the eyes either. Plus, he's so adorably dorky that it would be fun getting him in bed!”
“Harley,” said Ivy, firmly, “listen. What I was trying to say before you interrupted me, was, why does it have to be someone here? Why not just find a nice, normal guy that has no connection to your criminal life?”
“Aw, where's the fun in that?” she asked. “Really, though, it's not like I meant any of that. I'm not getting involved with any new guys for a while, I was just kidding around. I thought listing off different options would be kinda fun.”
And she really hadn't been planning on any sort of rebound. After all, she was planning on taking Gotham by storm on her own. Getting tangled up with a new criminal boyfriend would only complicate things. Still, she hadn't been lying about her preferences.
~X~
Edward Nygma sat alone in his cell, his face flushed and his thoughts racing. He had been like this for approximately an hour, and he didn't know when, or if, it was going to stop. He knew that he hadn't misheard her, and yet it seemed completely impossible that she had said the things that he'd heard. No matter how hard he thought on it, he was without an answer, which was a first for him. What was he supposed to do about this new information?
He had been enjoying his recreation time just as he did every day, when he had happened to pass Harley Quinn in what appeared to be a private conversation with Poison Ivy. He hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but the blonde was always so loud in everything she said, and he had a natural curiosity. The two hadn't even noticed him crossing the room behind them; there couldn't be any harm in walking a bit slower in order to “accidentally” overhear.
It was then that he had heard her say it, plan as day. “Ooh, I know, I know! The Riddler!” He had stopped short, then, thinking for a moment that she had noticed him and was calling out to him or pointing him out. But she went on, not looking in his direction, “Eddie is definitely older than me, and he's intelligent and not bad on the eyes either.” By this point, he was blushing, but his face turned a deep shade of crimson when he heard her finish with, “Plus, he's so adorably dorky that he would it would be fun getting him in bed!”
What?
At that point, he had hurried off, knowing that he had most certainly not been meant to hear that last part. He had asked a guard if he could go back to his cell, and he had remained there through the remainder of the recreation hour, in a state of dazed confusion.
Harley Quinn, the Joker's on-and-off girlfriend, the sexy little blonde that everyone wanted but knew was off-limits, had just confessed to finding him to be attractive. She had confessed to finding him attractive and she had openly admitted to having a desire to bed him. Him. Harley Quinn wanted him.
So now what was he to do? He had been far too busy with his schemes to pursue any relationships, and it wasn't as if women had been throwing themselves at him at any point. He had no experience in situations like this. Was he supposed to ask her outright or was he supposed to start things off slowly and build up to that? Did he even want this to happen?
Okay, he knew that there was a part of him that would answer that question with a resounding yes. She was gorgeous, and even he had those desires every now and then. It was about time he finally did something about it. And yet, another part of him wasn't sure if going after her was such a good idea. She was famous for running back to her so-called “lover”, and there was a strong chance she would rebuff his advances if she was planning on going back again.
The only option he was left with was doing nothing. There was no risk to sitting around waiting, and Harley still didn't know that he knew she was interested. There was no way that she was expecting him to make a move, so if she really wanted him, she would make the move herself, and if she didn't, she wouldn't.
Now all he had to do was try and stop over-thinking all the possibilities.